A young BEN BEZARK is bouncing a ball in front of our elementary school. While he plays, a young AARON SWARTZ provides advice for his new band. They are both in third grade. The hit song “Lump” By The Presidents of the United States is topping the charts.
AARON: You’ve got to have that special something in your songs, that little oomph, that “Lump” factor.
BEN: (disinterested) OK.
AARON: The Lump Factor is key. Your songs need to be more Lump.
BEN: Right.
It continues like this, Ben bouncing his ball, me extolling the Lump factor, Ben nodding quietly. Finally, it builds to a point that’s just completely absurd.
AARON: You have to feel the Lump, fill your songs with a Lump, you have to be Lump.
BEN: Well, we don’t want to be too much like Lump.
AARON: (backpedalling) Oh, no, no, you just want to the Lump quality, you want quality really…
posted March 26, 2005 07:42 PM (Education) (2 comments) #